How To Fry Eggs

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Pete44ru
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How To Fry Eggs

Post by Pete44ru »

.

A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.

Then, her husband burst suddenly into the kitchen.

"Be careful", he said, "CAREFUL ! ....... Put in some more butter ! ........ Oh my gosh ! ... You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY ! Turn them ! TURN THEM NOW ! ........ We need more butter...... Oh my gosh ! .... WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER now ?... ...... They're going to STICK ! ...... Careful, CAREFUL ! I SAID BE CAREFUL ! ........... You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking ! ........ NEVER !............ TURN them !.... HURRY UP ! .... Are you CRAZY ? ........ HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND ? ...... Don't forget to salt them - you know you always forget to salt them. ....... Use the salt ! .... USE THE SALT ! ..... THE SALT ! ... THE SALT !



The wife stared at him. "WHAT in the world is wrong with you ?......... You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs ?"



The husband calmly replied, "I just wanted to let you know what it feels like when I'm driving."

:mrgreen:


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xerts1191
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Re: How To Fry Eggs

Post by xerts1191 »

Been there!
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Blaine
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Re: How To Fry Eggs

Post by Blaine »

:lol: :lol: :lol:
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mark
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Re: How To Fry Eggs

Post by mark »

We had a back seat driver once.

Made up a sign for the windscreen, "Driver Under Instruction".

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Yours on L plates, Mark.
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Re: How To Fry Eggs

Post by gamekeeper »

:lol: :lol: :lol: I might just send this to a BSD I know.
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Pitchy
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Re: How To Fry Eggs

Post by Pitchy »

:lol: :lol:
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jeepnik
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Re: How To Fry Eggs

Post by jeepnik »

And then he made the trip to the ER for the grease burns on his face. Tis best to know when to keep your mouth shut.
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Re: How To Fry Eggs

Post by Griff »

If you're a cop (or ex-cop), you don't catch folks by "driving defensively"... Being of the "a good defense is only bested by a better offense" driving school mindset... I'm often called out by back seat drivers. Namely my son. But, like I told him on the day he got his 'learner's permit'... "If you're too scared to speed up and merge into traffic, stay on the frontage road. We'll figure out how to cross the lake on side roads..."

Now, driving a "big truck", one thing I hate is the "pack mentality"... Space is our mutual friend... you wanna pass me, it's okay. But, (insert favored naval expletive here) PASS me already! And wait till I won't be tailgating you when you do! And whatever you do, don't pull back in front AND slow down! I often wonder to myself what're people thinking... when they pull back in front of my rig, (which empty weighs nearly 35,000 lbs)... with just 5-10 feet to spare, so that little 3,600 lb p/u on their bumper can get around THEM...

I learned to drive when there were far more two-lane roads than folks deal with today. When passing meant getting into oncoming traffic (hopefully you were aware of the need to pick opportune times), to pass someone... So, I was taught to speed (insert favored naval expletive here) up in order to reduce the time you were in that oncoming traffic lane. I've never had anyone tell me the same directive doesn't apply on 4-, 6-, or even 8 lane roads!

Oh, and just so you can't ever say "...no one ever told me that...", that big heavy truck you passed going uphill... is very likely to quickly get back up to the speed limit going down... so if you don't keep YOUR speed up, you're relying on his brakes to keep from runnin' over your azz! Those are called "drag 'n' fly" trucks. Speed governed trucks are both a 'good' and 'bad' thing. Good in that they CAN'T go too fast... bad in that they instill a desire to make up the time they can't go the speed limit. If you ever noticed, Schneider, Prime, CFI, Swift, among several others will be seen inside city limits being issued speeding citations... That's because they're governed below the highway speed limit, and the driver feels they HAVE to keep that speed up to make their delivery on time.

Okay, rant off! :P
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Re: How To Fry Eggs

Post by mohavesam »

... and he lived happily ever after. Eating cold oatmeal for breakfast. 8)
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Re: How To Fry Eggs

Post by Ysabel Kid »

mohavesam wrote: Sun Mar 26, 2017 2:18 pm ... and he lived happily ever after. Eating cold oatmeal for breakfast. 8)
Bingo! :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Re: How To Fry Eggs

Post by Sixgun »

I sure can relate to that!----6
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jeepnik
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Re: How To Fry Eggs

Post by jeepnik »

mohavesam wrote: Sun Mar 26, 2017 2:18 pm ... and he lived happily ever after. Eating cold oatmeal for breakfast. 8)
And every other meal until the new teeth were installed.
Jeepnik AKA "Old Eyes"
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Pitchy
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Re: How To Fry Eggs

Post by Pitchy »

My wife doesn`t say anything, she just sits there holding the door handle. :lol:
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Re: How To Fry Eggs

Post by mark »

The vast majority of the heavy truck drivers are there to do a job. In most cases, is is a pleasure to share the roads with them.

The amateurs, heaven help us.

Mark
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Re: How To Fry Eggs

Post by Rusty »

After being married to the same Irish woman for 38 years one thing I've ;earned is that you need to pick your battles.
If you're gonna be stupid ya gotta be tough-
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Pete44ru
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Re: How To Fry Eggs

Post by Pete44ru »

mark wrote: Mon Mar 27, 2017 10:11 pm
The vast majority of the heavy truck drivers are there to do a job.

In most cases, is is a pleasure to share the roads with them.

:?: :?: :?: :?: :?:

I don't get it............ :roll:


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mark
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Re: How To Fry Eggs

Post by mark »

Basically, it's in response to Griff's reply.

Leave it to those that can do the job.

Cheers Mark
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