It's scary when you start making the same noises as your coffee maker.
Know how to prevent sagging?
Just eat till the wrinkles fill out. (this is my plan!)
These days about half the stuff in my shopping cart says, "For fast relief."
Old age is when your knees buckle and your belt won't.
My memory's not as sharp as it used to be.
Also, my memory's not as sharp as it used to be.
THE SENILITY PRAYER:
Grant me the senility to forget the people
I never liked anyway,
The good fortune to run into the ones I do, and
The eyesight to tell the difference.
