I think my wife is trying to kill me

Bitmap · Post by **Bitmap** » Sat Jan 05, 2008 8:11 pm

Tonight for dinner she made stew from the leftovers of a venison roast and she made scratch biscuits to go with it.

I'm so full I'm about to die.

JReed · Post by **JReed** » Sat Jan 05, 2008 8:13 pm

. Sounds like I should head to your house for dinner.

45-70- · Post by **45-70-** » Sat Jan 05, 2008 8:15 pm

You come here, to complain about that! You wont get no sympathy from us...........

By the way, are there any leftovers?

Bitmap · Post by **Bitmap** » Sat Jan 05, 2008 8:17 pm

45-70- wrote:
By the way, are there any leftovers?

Not much. When I started hearing the stretching in my stomach I thought I'd better stop.

J Miller · Post by **J Miller** » Sat Jan 05, 2008 8:32 pm

Bitmap,

Got a dog? They'll eat anything, and you wouldn't have to eat so much

.

Joe

Griff · Post by **Griff** » Sat Jan 05, 2008 8:33 pm

45-70- wrote:You come here, to complain about that! You wont get no sympathy from us...........
By the way, are there any leftovers?

Ditto.

mescalero1 · Post by **mescalero1** » Sat Jan 05, 2008 8:40 pm

You are kidding us , right?
Where did you find a woman that knows how to biscuts from scratch?

1886 · Post by **1886** » Sat Jan 05, 2008 9:56 pm

Scratch Bisquets? Bisquick? People still do that? Wow. I have not had scratch bisquets since my great grand ma died over 25 yrs ago. Good eats. 1886.

Dave · Post by **Dave** » Sat Jan 05, 2008 9:57 pm

I feel a remodel coming on! Be careful

1886 · Post by **1886** » Sat Jan 05, 2008 10:00 pm

Dave could be right. I smell honey-do mellon. 1886.

C. Cash · Post by **C. Cash** » Sat Jan 05, 2008 10:18 pm

I keep thinking of all that good Okie milk gravy(made with whole milk, bacon drippings and Browned flour) and homemade biscuits that I ate as a younster......

makes my arteries harden up just thinking about it! I miss my Grandma's cookin. My wife's from New Jersey. If it doesn't go in a toaster, cluck, or get served on a hoagie roll, you ain't havin it:roll:

crawdaddyjim · Post by **crawdaddyjim** » Sat Jan 05, 2008 11:10 pm

My Granny hated my Mom. Just the way it was. My Dad is a only child and his Mom(Granny) used to spoil him some kinda bad. Hand fed him until he went into the Air Force. NO joke.

Any way Granny was not about to give Mom her secret recipes and such. But she didn't want to take them to the grave. So she taught me. Now my own mother says that Granny would pick me over her own son so that should give you some idea of my standing in Granny's eyes. I could do no wrong

.

Long way around to telling you that I a 40 something yr old man knows how to make a scratch bisquits and milk gravy with scrambled eggs so light you have to keep your bisquit on em or they will float away! I learned how to catch chickens and can foods from her as well. I am comforted by the knowledge that I can supply my family with all the stuff needed for a happy life.

Now do you think I could interest any of my sons in learning these things!?
Thankfully my daughter has shown a willingness to be around me and asks a lot of questions.

Post by **Ysabel Kid** » Sat Jan 05, 2008 11:14 pm

Bitmap wrote:Tonight for dinner she made stew from the leftovers of a venison roast and she made scratch biscuits to go with it.

I'm so full I'm about to die.

It wouldn't be the worst way to go!

Travis Morgan · Post by **Travis Morgan** » Sat Jan 05, 2008 11:46 pm

Cash,

I come from a long line of Okies, and neither my wife nor her mama can cook! Apparently, they think spice racks are just for decoration! I think they're conspiring to "Bland" me to death!

On eating 'til you're stuffed: I was in goodwill for their $1.10 sale the other day, and saw the perfect thing for when I make a big batch of hillbilly food: Maternity BDU pants! The elastic top would be dandy for the times I try to founder myself on good cookin'!

rimrock · Post by **rimrock** » Sat Jan 05, 2008 11:57 pm

Married my near perfect wife of 23+ yrs mainly because she can cook with the best of 'em. She'd be perfect if I could just get her to be a gun nut.

claybob86 · Post by **claybob86** » Sun Jan 06, 2008 12:36 am

Invite me over. She can try to kill me, too!

Gun Runner · Post by **Gun Runner** » Sun Jan 06, 2008 1:29 am

My wife cant COOK. Before we were married her kids (from a previous marriage) knew when dinner was ready by the smoke alarm going off or a pot on fire sailing into the back yard. When I started cooking the kids used to ask what it was becuse it wasant burnt. I learned to cook when I was around 10, and keep trying to learn new things.

Gun Runner

Travis Morgan · Post by **Travis Morgan** » Sun Jan 06, 2008 1:52 am

The only time my wife cooks is some fancy stuff to impress people at office parties. At home, it's all bland stuff or frozen pizzas. There's so many pizza crumbs on the bottom of the oven that it always smokes when she fires it up, so, when I walk in the house and smell smoke, I ask, "Whatcha burnin?". We've been together long enough that there's nothing she can cut me off from.

stretch · Post by **stretch** » Sun Jan 06, 2008 6:59 am

Sounds like you'll go a happy man!

nralover · Post by **nralover** » Sun Jan 06, 2008 7:54 am

All the guys at work envy me because I eat deer roast, homemade bread, chicken and dumplings, fried catfish, blackberry cobbler, steamed asparagus and the like, while their wives send them Lunchables. Yes you read that correctly- LUNCHABLES!

gon2shoot · Post by **gon2shoot** » Sun Jan 06, 2008 8:05 am

My wife cant make buscuits, she makes them big ol light fluffy things, I like the thin hard ones that'll soak up a quart of gravy.
She does make the best scratch pecan or buttermilk pies you ever et, so I let her stay

ceb · Post by **ceb** » Sun Jan 06, 2008 9:54 am

Sunday morning and were talken bout biscuits and gravy!

My wife don't cook much either, but ifin you can talk yours into sharin the hows on them biscuits, I'll give it a try.

RIHMFIRE · Post by **RIHMFIRE** » Sun Jan 06, 2008 10:13 am

Oh boy my wife can cook!
Just about everyone in the family can cook....

But in my earlier years...I dated a girl who was a lousy cook...
The first meal she cooked...I couldn't eat it....I couldn't tell you
what it was....
So I gave it to the dog....and he wouldn't eat it either
and he started licking his butt.....
She asked ..........."Why is he licking his butt"?

He's trying to get the taste out of his mouth!

jdad · Post by **jdad** » Sun Jan 06, 2008 10:39 am

You're a lucky man to be killed off in such a fine manner!

My wife has only made about a dozen meals, in our 21 years of marriage.
She married a chef.

I had 5 1/2 years of schooling, 2 degrees, then training with manic depressive, screaming, European masters. I got out of the trade 1 year after we were married. That industry has the 2nd highest divorce and alchoholic rate. Cooking is like anyother "trade". Once you learn how to do it right, it becomes second nature.

stormspotter · Post by **stormspotter** » Sun Jan 06, 2008 3:37 pm

Same thing happened to me a while back. Home made stew (seconds of course), home made bread (3 big slices) and two big tumblers of iced tea. A half hour later the bread began to swell and I thought I was going to die.

stretch · Post by **stretch** » Sun Jan 06, 2008 4:43 pm

My wife has made very few things I just couldn't eat.

One time she made a fish dinner with some sort of
marinade that was just God-awful. I couldn't eat it,
and it became obvious that neither could she! We
decided to give it to the cat. He took one sniff, turned
up his nose, and walked away. We still laugh about
tha one!

rroberts · Post by **rroberts** » Sun Jan 06, 2008 6:17 pm

Today my wife made a vegetable lasagna for lunch. After lunch she asked me what I thought? Only thing I could come up with was "somewhere some poor rabbit was starving to death." That didn't go over to well. You would think after 28 years of marriage she would know that I was a meat and potatoes guy.

rjohns94 · Post by **rjohns94** » Sun Jan 06, 2008 6:46 pm

I had Yack meatballs, and boar sausagein my spaghatti this evening. MMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

Marlin .35 · Post by **Marlin .35** » Sun Jan 06, 2008 10:37 pm

I would love to come for a visit!!!!!!!! Art

Travis Morgan · Post by **Travis Morgan** » Sun Jan 06, 2008 10:45 pm

Do they get juice boxes if they're good?

Bitmap · Post by **Bitmap** » Mon Jan 07, 2008 9:48 am

Travis Morgan wrote:Do they get juice boxes if they're good?

I must be slow. What are you talking about?

I think my wife is trying to kill me

I think my wife is trying to kill me

Re: I think my wife is trying to kill me